
its the time of the year again when i feel like i'm in an emotional roller coaster. every feeling is heightened, i feel like i am absorbing the emotions of people around me. at the end of the day, i feel totally drained. well, one upside is that i tend to lose my appetite if am in one of these moods, therefore decreasing my need to go to the gym haha! (justifying =P).
i am sad, melancholic, angry, confused and numb all at the same time. happy? i get my share of laughs every once in a while, but after that, the gloomy and pensive mood sets in again. I really don't know why i feel like this, maybe i am just hormonal =P. still, maybe there are stuff i need to face, issues i need to resolve, situations i need to accept and consequences i need to take responsibility for. i guess i just need time to sort things out and eventually (hopefully) get a grasp on the reality i need to face and live with.
unanswered questions may need to be answered or not ... depending on whether i really do want to know the answers. a friend said that ignorance is bliss and that there are just some things thats better left alone. trying to dig up the reasons behind past actions and the whys behind the whats is two-faced: you either end up feeling better knowing the truth or you end up feeling more miserable. in the end, i guess a few things do matter: how i accept what i learned and what i do about it. someone once told me, its okay to have what if's but it would be better to have more what nows. i guess it kinda means that its okay to have regrets (who doesn't?) but it would be better not to dwell on them. it would be best to work on what we have now since we really cannot do anything about actions already committed in the past.